Rookie

Tavi of Style Rookie has just launched a new online alternative magazine for teen girls called Rookie Mag. I'm 21 and am hence not really the target audience, but that doesn't matter - what does matter is that it's incredible. It's refreshingly honest and it's so nice to see a magazine for teenagers that promotes a love of film, books, and music, above dieting and ridiculous flirting advice. It's also so nice to see articles that promote love and respect for other women.

I also enjoy the fact that the magazine has feminist undertones and an obvious penchant for 90s pop culture, punk and alternative music, and vintage and D.I.Y clothing. It's also nice that it treats it's readers like creative, intelligent young adults as opposed to the braindead unwashed. Though I did get offended when guest writer Dan Savage assumed that the largely American teenagers reading the magazine would actually need to google the Columbine shootings. Seriously, they're American. And they're not that young. Luckily, the actual regular writers seem to respect their readers and some of what they're offering is beautiful.

I particularly loved an article called 'Higher Learning: Remembrances of the first year of high school, and advice for getting through your own, from some of our favourite grown-ups.'

There are some amazing sections from so many awesome people including Zooey Deschanel, and Alia Shawkat - go read the whole thing. But I loved this one in particular, from writer Lesley Arfin featuring some ridiculously realistic advice:

"Dear Kid in High School,

Not that you really give a shit what I have to say, cuz kids in high school love not giving a shit, but I also know that you actually give a huge steaming pile of shit, so shut up your face and listen.

You’re allowed to care about stuff. That’s the first thing. Even if you think it’s stupid or weird, like polka music or “being obsessed with mimes.” One day you will look back not at all the things that made you cool enough to fit in, but the things that didn’t. And you will love them.

The second thing is write everything down. Even if you don’t like writing, just write about every obsession, story, hatred, happiness—whatever. And save it. All of it. I say this because when you’re an adult, you will get drunk with your friends one night and read your diary out loud to them.

It will be the funniest night of your life.

When teachers say, “This is the best time of your life,” they are wrong. They are only saying that because they’re teachers and they have to look at your weird faces every day. There is no “best time of your life,” but rather perfect moments, like when someone’s gum falls out of their mouth while they’re telling a story, or when a jerk is walking toward you and accidentally gets hit in the head with a soccer ball. Make sure to store these moments in a safe place in your brain. They will be useful to you in the future, I promise.

But also, quit bitching about being in high school. At least your mom still makes you dinner at night, and that rules.

I’m not gonna say don’t do drugs because that’s ridiculous, just don’t take anything that is known as an “epidemic” (crystal meth, Oxycontin). When they tell you in health that they’re addictive, they’re not “just trying to scare you into being a normie,” and it’s not all “government propaganda.”

Stick with pot, acid and booze and you will have way better memories. When you do acid or shrooms and you think you might be having a bad trip, get a piece of candy and hold your friend’s hand and it will go away. Try not talking for a while, too. If it’s still bad, well, whatever, it will be over in 14 hours.

If you want to stay out all night, say you’re sleeping at a friend’s house.
If you come home super early and your mom says, “Why are you home so early?” you say, “I got homesick and I missed you.” She will then make you eggs and you can watch TV.

If you don’t want to change for gym a good trick is putting sweatpants on over your jeans. If you don’t want to go swimming say you have your period. If you want to go home early or get out of a class, give the nurse a general “my stomach hurts.” If she asks you, “How does it hurt?” you say, “It’s just pain.” There’s no cure for that.

You might feel at times that you are ugly and disgusting and unlovable. Some of you might feel as though you are beautiful and hot and cool and awesome. Know this: When you’re in your 20s you go through, like, a time machine of opposite days. What I mean is, everyone who thinks they are hot shit in high school eventually turns into cold diarrhea by their 30s. And all you ugly nerds will eventually start to sparkle like geodes. If you don’t believe me you can ask Facebook.

Hmm, what else what else? Some things I regret: not learning an instrument (I gave up playing the sax, wish I hadn’t), not learning a foreign language (got kicked out of Spanish), not taking more acid (was afraid of bad trips but regret now due to lack of funny stories).

I don’t know what else. You guys are gonna do whatever you’re gonna do, fuck that up, do it again, and so it goes.

You all probably know just what you’re doing anyway and don’t need any advice at all, isn’t that right, you little smartass?

I’ll be watching you. I am the eyes and ears of this institution."